The righteous who walks in his integrity—
blessed are his children after him!
Proverbs 20:7
Dads teach their children all kinds of things. How to cut the grass, how to edge the yard, how to change the oil, how to change a tire, how to obey, how to catch a fish, and how to clean a fish, and so many other things. But there is one thing a father teaches his children that has nothing to do with grilling a steak or keeping the windshield wiper fluid filled in the car. It is righteousness and integrity.
I wanted to encourage all the dads out there this morning and all of you who had dads. You are blessed, and your children are always watching. Does that make you nervous? What do they see?
Dads should be righteous
A righteous dad is one who had a life-changing experience with the Lord. The Apostle Paul had that kind of experience in Acts 9 because God changed his heart. He became a righteous man. This change doesn’t mean that he became a perfect man. I want to relieve any worries out there that you have to be perfect. I don’t know any perfect dads. We all have our struggles and challenging times.
We all lose our cool and say things we regret. And sometimes our pride makes it difficult to say, “I’m sorry” when our children need to hear it. But the one necessary trait of a great father is that they have placed their trust in Jesus and what He did on the cross. This change makes a dad righteous. (IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: IT DOESN’T MEAN WE’RE PERFECT) The internal change in your heart is an amazing thing. Jesus tells us that, “Out of the abundance of your heart, your mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34). So what we say matters.
Again, it doesn’t mean we’re perfect, but it means Christ changed us. And I promise your children will see it. Your changed life and the spiritual growth that you pursue show your children what is important to you. Cutting the grass is important, and changing a tire is sometimes necessary, but being righteous eventually produces a blessing in your children’s lives.
Dads should walk in integrity
A righteous dad (changed) will walk in integrity. This is the tricky part. A dad who is righteous on the inside will walk with integrity on the outside. Righteousness is what we are, and integrity is what others see. Integrity is a word that means blameless before others. When others see you, do they see someone who is blameless? Does it mean that we won’t mess up? Nope. But it means when we mess up, we admit it to those around us, confess it to Jesus, and keep striving to be blameless before others. Why is this important? Because perception is reality. What people see is what they believe.
Think about this. Your home is a safe place for you. I imagine each of us put our guards down and relax physically, mentally, and emotionally at home. This relaxing is sometimes good and sometimes not so good. As dads, we should make every attempt to walk blamelessly before our family and children. They should see you reading your Bible. They should see you going to church. They should see and understand that Jesus means more to you than anything else in life.
When a dad walks in integrity, his children notice.
Children will follow their dad
Ok dads, the pressure is on. This final point is the privilege of a life well-lived. More often than not, children who see their father as righteous and God-fearing will also appreciate his integrity. Who he is is how he lives. When children see their dads following Christ and that it actually works out, they are more likely to be led to follow in those same footsteps.
If you asked your children today, “What comes to your mind when you think about me,” what would they say? Could they say you are righteous and walk with integrity? Can they recognize God working in your life? You don’t have to be perfect, but you should strive to be godly.
I want my children to know that I love the Lord, trust Him every second of every day, and when times get hard that I fall into the Lord’s arms and beg for His compassion and care for me.
Over the years, I’ve prayed diligently for my children. Now that they are adults, I think I pray more for them that they will take the mantle of righteousness and integrity and live it before their friends and their own families. I pray for them because it is not an absolute that they will follow in righteousness and integrity. They are in just as much a spiritual battle as you are.
Be encouraged! Dads, you have a considerable responsibility to point your children to Christ by who you are and how you live that out with integrity day by day. God has given that to you as a privilege. How will you accept this critical challenge?