Overlook their faults
Let’s face it. Friendships are difficult. Everyone messes up and everyone has bad days. In times like these we need a good friend to stand beside us and encourage us, not tear us down. It is too easy to point the finger in our significant friendships and criticize their faults. This is simply not the right way to maintain healthy friendships. Friendships are built on mutual respect that encourages and not discourages. Good friends should understand each other below the surface. This means overlooking their faults. This does not minimize the accountability that we should have within friendships.
Undervalue your wants
Everyone wants something. It’s no secret that people are selfish. Yeah….that means you! Everyone is selfish. No matter how hard we work on it, from time to time we are selfish. This means that we place our own wants and desires ahead of our friends wants and needs. Bad things happen in relationships when this kind of behavior starts. When we value our wants over the needs of our friends, we actually devalue our friendships. You might say, “Not me! I’m never selfish!” Let me be very clear…..YES YOU ARE! Everyone is selfish and struggles with their own desires. Paul says in Philippians 2:3 to, Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. God gave us this instruction because He knew we would struggle in this area. Instead of undervaluing your friend’s wants and needs, try overvaluing their needs. I bet things will begin to improve.
Grow in Christ together
Finally, grow in Christ together. We need each other. If you are in a friendship that fails to hold each other accountable and only talks about surface topics, then you most likely aren’t growing in Christ together. Growing in Christ is difficult and takes years of intentional and careful attention to each other and to God.
[Tweet “The more you value the Giver, the more precious the gift will be to you.”]
This kind of friendship cares deeply for the spiritual maturity of each other. This kind of friendship is rich and special. It takes time and special care to develop this kind of love and respect for each other.
Take some time to reflect on the amazing gift God gives you through significant friendships. The more you value the Giver, the more precious the gift will be to you.