If nothing else, I figured the title of this post would probably get your attention. Don’t stop reading. This may be one of the most important things you’ve read in a long time. Do I hate small groups? NO. However, I can understand why some dislike the idea of small groups and want to attempt to dispel any negative preconceptions you might have. Truth is, everyone is going through a hurting, healing and/or growing process their lives, and a small group ministry in your church is one of the best ways to navigate through these events.
Small groups force me to be vulnerable
If there is one thing I don’t like it’s vulnerability. Maybe it’s the man in me, but I do not like to be vulnerable. As men, we manufacture emotional walls to protect us from vulnerability. I get it. There aren’t many people who embrace openness and transparency in a small group setting. Some believe vulnerability is a sign of weakness and others believe it is unnecessary. I just don’t like it. NOT SO FAST! Whether I like it or not, it is actually very healthy for me. When I realize that I am weak and God’s grace is sufficient for me in that weakness, I am better able to accept being vulnerable in front of others. So, vulnerability is not weakness, but humility. We should always remember that “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble” (James 4:6).
- Vulnerability = A humbled life
- Invulnerability = A self-centerd, isolated, and prideful life
Small groups force me to socially connect with other people
But you don’t understand, I am just not a social person. I don’t really like people, and they just have a ton of issues they need to work through by themselves. As for me, I’ve got no issues, and it seems that me and my best friend, the flat screen TV, get along just fine. Whenever I’m tired of hearing the noise of the television, I just turn it off. In fact, that works pretty well. I can’t do that in a small group setting. If I ever need to talk with someone, I just talk to the flat screen. And by the way, it never talks back, gives me silly advice, or gets in my business. Works great, huh? NOT SO FAST! God created us to be social beings and interact with each other. Otherwise, how will we accomplish the great commission? How will we bear each other’s burdens?
- Socially connected groups spend time together
- Socially connected groups facilitate spiritual growth
Small groups force me to prioritize
I’ve just got too much to do. I really do. I don’t have time for another scheduled night on my calendar. Softball, baseball, cheerleading, television shows, etc. all take up valuable space on my calendar and squeezes out any chance for me to take up another night of the week for some small group meeting. It’s just too inconvenient. You just can’t even begin to understand my schedule! NOT SO FAST! Excuses about a lack of time are generally the result of misdirected priorities. It really is all about priorities. For me to participate in a small group, I have to make it a priority. Here is the way I have to think.
- My spiritual growth should be a high priority in my life.
- Attending a small group is a powerful way to grow spiritually.
Small groups force me to share my life story
Not only is my story insignificant, but I really don’t want people to know any more about me than they already know. I don’t want them to know my past and present story. In fact, I actually want people to think I’m who I am on on Sunday morning. They only see me one day a week anyway. I can fake it for a day and it really won’t matter. I can fool them all. Really, I don’t want to hear anyone else’s story either. I have enough problems on my own. NOT SO FAST! God has created in each of us a story. Unless others hear our story, they will never be able to authentically connect with us. As difficult as it may be, the more connected I become with my small group, the more likely I am to share my story. And by the way, sometimes my story can actually help someone else who might be going through something I’ve already been through. God uses our own experiences to encourage others. Sometimes the story of others might even encourage me!
- Our stories can encourage others
- Other’s stories can encourage us
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Small groups force me to change the way I think about church
Church is about sitting in a classroom, listening to a teacher, shaking hands, participating in a complimentary prayer/gossip time, going to worship, watching cute children in a children’s sermon, singing songs, leaving worship, smiling and shaking hands, and speaking to the pastor on the way out. This whole new small group thing is not the way I’ve ever done church. For me to embrace small groups, I have to fundamentally think differently about the concept of church and its purpose for my life and the lives of those in my community. But, I just don’t like change. NOT SO FAST! Church is actually about change…….life-change! I have to be willing to do whatever it takes to help build bridges and relationships with others so that I might earn the right to share Christ with them and they might come to know Christ as their Savior and Lord. Also, so others might have the chance to grow spiritually. Maybe I’ve thought about church the wrong way all these years.
- Building relationships = Earned right to share Christ
- Sharing Christ = life-change
Small groups force me to consider local missions
I do enough already. I tithe and my tithe goes to support local and international missionaries. They get paid to do the work and are very qualified to do it. Anyway, there is enough to do around my own house. There’s no need for me to get involved locally or internationally. NOT SO FAST! The truth is that if we should love our neighbors as ourselves, we should do for others the same way we would do for ourselves. This could cause us some trouble unless we think as Jesus did. One of the best ways to help others understand the love of Jesus is to do something kind for them. This is missions. Missions isn’t necessarily flying 12 hours to a remote part of Brazil or giving money to a cause. It can simply be cleaning a yard or painting a room in a public school. I have concluded that the best way to do this is through small groups. Many hands do more work. As your small groups grow closer together, they will have the chance to experience missions together.
- Loving our neighbor as ourselves = Missions!
- Missions = building bridges and relationships
So, what’s the point? The point is if you attend a church with a small group ministry and are not involved, you are missing out on so many opportunities. Over the past 10 years, the paradigm has shifted from the Sunday School concept to Weekly Small Groups. Small Groups offer so much more connectedness and spiritual growth opportunities. I want to encourage you to invest your lives into the lives of others through a small group experience. If you do, your life will quite possibly never be the same!